A Life Reclaimed: Finding My Way Back to Myself

I've reached that interesting stage of life where I know an awful lot about some things, considerably less about others, and have absolutely no patience left for pretending otherwise.

Welcome to Gen X, menopause, and whatever the hell comes next.

Somewhere between getting an education, working, running businesses, keeping a household functioning, and doing all the things we're supposed to do, I got tired. Not the kind of tired that a good night's sleep fixes. Although a good night's sleep would be lovely, if my internal thermostat and bladder could get their shit together long enough to allow it.

Burnout is a funny thing. Well, not funny haha. More funny in that one day you realize you've spent so much time taking care of business that you've forgotten what you actually enjoy doing.

And I've decided I'd like some of that back.

For me, that means getting my hands dirty. Sometimes literally.

I've been an herbalist and soapmaker for years. I love the science behind what I make as much as the tradition. I love knowing why something works, not just repeating something I read on the internet because somebody with a pretty Instagram account said it was so.

I spin wool. I cook. I preserve food. I experiment with recipes, both in the kitchen and in the soap studio. I have a ridiculous number of interests, a healthy appreciation for old-fashioned skills, and a tendency to get a little carried away when something catches my attention.

Case in point: I've recently been working my way through a mountain of CSA vegetables and two bushels of apples. There's apple butter, pepper jelly, salsa verde, pickled radishes, and enough zucchini bread to make me question some of my life choices.

And every evening, I still stand in front of the refrigerator trying to figure out what to make for dinner like I'm on an episode of Chopped. Except nobody's handing me $10,000, and the mystery basket is whatever needs to be eaten before it turns into a science experiment.

I'm not trying to become completely self-sufficient. I like electricity, indoor plumbing, and being able to buy toilet paper without making it myself, thank you very much.

What I am trying to do is reclaim some of the things that have gotten lost along the way.

My curiosity. My creativity. My time. The satisfaction of knowing how to do things for myself. The freedom to spend an afternoon spinning wool without feeling like I should be doing something more productive.

And maybe, just maybe, a little of the woman I was before everything became a responsibility.

That's what A Life Reclaimed is about.

I'll share recipes, herbal knowledge, kitchen experiments, projects, occasional disasters, and bits and pieces of everyday life. Some things I've been doing for decades. Others I'm still figuring out. I'll tell you what I know, what I don't, and when I've made a complete mess of something.

I'm not interested in presenting a perfectly curated life. Nor am I planning to put every detail of my existence on the internet. Some things are nobody's damn business, and I rather like it that way.

But I suspect I'm not the only woman who's reached this point in life and thought, Is this it? Is this what all those years of working my ass off were leading up to?

I hope not.

I hope there's room for more laughter, more learning, more creativity, and a lot less worrying about what everybody else thinks.

And I'm hoping there are a few other people out there who feel the same way.

If that's you, welcome. I think we'll get along just fine.

Pull up a chair. The coffee's on, there's probably something bubbling on the stove, and I have absolutely no idea what we're having for dinner.